A rambling story by many authors.......?

[Jazz]

......"calm down, calm down".........tempers were still rising however and there was confusion.....people felt the need to take sides. The D.I. felt that he had stumbled into something he couldn't understand......he was from Birmingham originally....a place called Aston. His job was to solve crimes........colours seemed to be drifting around in his thoughts......blue, white, claret......then the weird business of the green. Things of course are not always black and white he thought.....there are shades of grey............

[Pollypeterborough]

.....And that horrible red and blue. S*** he then realized he had his red drapes on **** me he said to him self should have had my green one's on with my black beetle crushers and white socks and then all hell .........

[Jazz]

.....broke loose again. "My job is to arrest criminals, a person or persons who have committed that most heinous of crimes, MURDER!" the D.I. shouted. "Not one murder but THREE!".
Everyone was quiet...........the blonde, leggy woman, slowly walked over to him, untied his hands and stood beside him. "I'm with the police on this one" she muttered......"Enough is enough". The fat man and Dereck meanwhile started to sidle towards the door......The man in the red drapes began dancing by himself seemingly oblivious of everyone else...........

[Deleted]

.....................Spume and his companion were now having a good old laugh observing the 'Big Jobs' as they were called by The People. It helped that as far as the two of them were concerned the DI's pocket was as transparent as glass. Although to everyone who was not of The People it remained just a normal coat pocket albeit a deep one. "Do ya fancy a bit more mischief?" said Spume. "Oh! yes please that would be great." was the reply. Without further delay the tiny greenish fellow began to chant in a language almost forgotten in the mists of time. Outside the pocket things began to happen.............

[Jazz]

.........Suddenly, a multi coloured cloud appeared along with strange half human shapes. Each of these zombie like creatures assumed a threatening pose, surrounding the humans in the room. Spume uttered another weird incantation...."DETINU ELTSACWEN....NOOT YMRA!". The strange creatures turned as one body and began shuffling towards the fat man and Dereck.............

[Deleted]

............"Ah! bugger." said the DI. "That's all we need. The bloody Peterborough Rock and Roll appreciation society turning up in force." Then the band hit the stage, Jean Vince and The Blue Cops, a tribute to fifties music. Some kind of crossover between Chuck Berry and The Stray Cats only not as good as either. The Blonde looked at the DI. "Fancy a dance?" he said. "You asking?" was the reply. "Yeah I'm asking!" "I'm dancing then!" As they headed for the floor another person entered the room.....................

[Pollypeterborough]

........ he was a good looking lad dressed in his 50s attire, he did look the part from peterborough, oh well. He spoke in a southern tongue but sounded nice all the same. Looking at the DI, he said "do you need helping out here" then the blonde saw him and made a bee line for him "Hi big boy" she said fluttering her eyes. He looked at her and in a flash they made a .......

[Jazz]

........dash for the door, pushing and shoving their way through the crowd....."THIS WAY!" shouted the blonde pointing to a flash looking sports car. They both jumped in the car and sped away towards.......

[Pollypeterborough]

..... the north circular "where are we going?" the blonde asked. "We are going up the A1" said the good looking rocker, speeding along the road combing his DA and looking in the mirror at the same time. There was a horrible red and blue car on their heels. Then he felt her hand on his thigh, looking at her with a smile on his ......

[Jazz]

....face, he mumbled "Don't worry there'll be plenty of time for that later, babe." Meanwhile their car accelerated to 85mph but the red and blue car was hot on their tail........"I'm going to have to do some fancy driving to get rid of these b*****ds!" "Don't worry, honey, there's ways and means to get rid of them", the blonde replied before pressing a button on the dashboard. He looked in the mirror.......behind him a large cloud of green smoke billowed across the road, causing havoc, he imagined to following drivers. He laughed, then...........

[Deleted]

....................realised he was no longer in a sports car, but hanging on for grim death to the back of a mobility scooter. The Blonde had also disappeared and been replaced with an elderly grey haired woman in a crash helmet. His drape had also gone walkabout and he was wearing a matching dressing gown and pyjamas along with slippers. Yet the biggest shock of all was that he was no longer twenty-three years old! "Now that's what I call mischief!", said Spume before turning to his accomplice to ask for a........................

[Pollypeterborough]

........ A bloody go And then he started singing. ( dreaming Im! allways dreaming Whating for........ )

[Jazz]

.........."special cigarette".....which had the effect of making him, shall we say, a bit disorientated, a bit dazed........a bit like being intoxicated but better! The mobility scooter started to lift off above the motorway........"Yipeeeeeeeeeh!" yelled the pyjama clad old man....."This is what I call living!". Meanwhile his partner had turned a shade of green and looked as though she was going to be sick. Far below them the red and blue car continued the chase, the fat man stuck his head out of the car's window and started firing a gun upwards......it was no ordinary gun though...........

[BRS]

..............no.....the gun was supplied by the Corprorate Media and when he pulled the trigger - it replaced all worldly knowledge - totally - and filled his brain with Corporate/Government sh!t....

[Pollypeterborough]

...... Just like the pigeons in trafalgar square. The old man had a new lease of life just one more drag of the fag, and then he was back with blonde this is more like it he said to himself, there was no B***** Corprorate S*** in my........